Big tears on my kids last day of school! Thankfully we have a couple weeks to lay low before summer camp starts (which my 10 yo daughter is dreading).
Both of my kids are runners when they get upset! How do you deal with it? If I don’t chase after them I get accused of not caring, but if I do will they just keep running?
Yes, I get accused of not caring about their feelings. They will come back and say something like “I was hurt/sad/fill in the blank and no one even checked on me!” It was probably 5 minutes max when they come back over and say this. This is generally from the younger one. I think my older one does want to be left alone but I get nervous about her running outside and potentially off to somewhere I may not be able to find her.
In Houston, we are in our 4th week of summer. First a trip, then a half-day camp at our school, then 2 weeks where my son didn't know anyone at his day camps. He is now 11 and handled that way better than he would have in the past, but around midweek, he runs out of steam. Last week, he woke up with a stomach ache, we let him miss a day + go for partial days after that (with temperatures over 100 outside for soccer and that seemed rational, though they had some inside space too).
This week he says all the kids scream at his camp, lots of screaming. He goes to a very quiet Montessori school so I'm sure this is jarring to him! But also good for him to see other schools and cultures. ANYWAY, now he is begging not to go. We've compromised on a shorter day. But I'm still like DAMN. Why do I spend all this effort setting up camps to have so much frustration when they finally roll around?
Also this week is archery + horseback riding, but he says they do more music and art than either of the named activities (1st day a horse came to them and they each sat on it for a few minutes, 3 days include a bus ride out of town to a ranch with horses).
Another misrepresentation I see a lot with camps is the stated times (in January February) of like 8am-4pm. Then when it really rolls around they shorten the day to be: drop off between 8 and 9 pick up 3-4. So you know they are just sitting around in those transition hours...It's a scam.
Additionally, Payflex, to pay for these camps with pretax money, and it's annoying to basically have the money withheld from my paycheck, while I have to pay for the camps out of pocket...then other years, to get the reimbursement, they've been sticklers about the receipts saying my son's age, but at least that was a bit smoother this year, though the money hasn't shown up yet.
And running off – my son did that around the age of 8 a few times, in an airport too! And some times after that and even within this year, but way less. Anyway, it one of the major reasons we started therapy as a family + it has helped with many things. We do equine therapy and it's fun + hopefully logging in some good relationship skills before puberty really hits hard. https://naturallifemanship.com/
Don't want to make it seem that Texas is all horses...like it may sound in this post, we really do have to travel out of the city (though all the sprawl!) to get to them...
I find that the hardest part of the summer is the sibling fighting! My kids are 7,5, and 3 and the fighting feels like it’s nearly constant! Just wanted to post this so that any other parents experiencing this feel less alone :)
So much fighting. Still at 11,9,7...but maybe a little bit less than at 7,5,3 and omg I am once again realizing I can’t believe my husband somehow wfh during 2020 with kids at age 8,6,4y
The fighting is so hard! It's finally dying down now here that my kids are older ... they just don't engage with each other as much, which makes it easier. Hang in there!!!
I feel like my kids are fighting more as they get older. They are 10 and 8, my oldest has ADHD and she wants to boss her brother because she gets more corrections and it just leads to disaster. Summer is so hard!
OMG love this prompt because this transition is SO hard in my household and I need to vent. For my younger kid (6 yo, just finished kindergarten) this is her first summer "off"/not in preschool (pandemic summer 2020 not withstanding) so there has just been lots of "when am I in first grade?", "what day is swim lessons?", "do I go to camp tomorrow?", "when do we go on vacation???" Endless questions. I make monthly calendars for the kids to help visualize time and what is coming next, which works great when we are on a routine schedule, but not right now.
My older daughter (age 9, just finished 3rd grade) sounds a lot like your 8 yo Melinda! So much slamming, huffing, eye rolling, "I SAID I DON'T WANT TO GO TO CAMP!!!", etc. I'm definitely feeling frazzled after the general schedule craziness of the last month of school - the field trips, field day, performances, kinder promotion, etc etc. and then being in summer break in a family with both parents who work full time, M-F with limited flexibility.
My kids ended school last Wednesday and this week is the only week of camps we are doing. My older kid has not enjoyed them and I relate to what another commenter said about spending all the energy and money trying to organize camps and ultimately kid doesn't enjoy them and they present their own logistical challenges (like being flung into every corner of the metro area so we spend a ton of time in the car). I'm trying an experiment this summer of hiring a summer caregiver to be with the kids about 80% of the work week who will (hopefully) facilitate a more relaxed summer of outings, playdates with friends, craft and cooking projects at home. I worked as a summer nanny in college and it was a great gig for me, so I'm cautiously optimistic. My fear is that we will end up in a sibling rivalry spiral due to all the togetherness. FINGERS CROSSED.
Oh, great idea to hire a summer caregiver! I am crossing my fingers with you! Also, super smart to make monthly calendars. My 8yo loves the visual reminders, too. GOOD LUCK!
I'm so glad I'm not alone. The last day of school here was May 24th, but that happened to be the day of my cousin's high school graduation in my hometown, which is 4 hours away. Instead of sitting in the car for 8 hours in a day (I went alone and needed to be back to care for the kids the next day since no school), I used miles to fly down and back. Except, upon my return, my aunt took me to the airport an hour after I requested, and I missed my flight. The last one home that night. After three rental car desks, I finally found an available car to drive home. Before hitting the road at 11 PM, I went to the bathroom, and the baby that had miscarried - did I mention I was experiencing a miscarriage at this time? - came out and landed on the toilet seat. I can't make this up.
That was how summer started for us, and it's been pretty brutal since then. Last week was a reprieve when we were at the beach with family and had entertainment and extra hands (my stepmom cooked dinner, and omg what a difference that makes in an evening with littles!). Our biggest issue is the almost-6yo is whiny and needs constant entertainment. He's a really empathetic kid but seems to be in a lull for perspective-taking and has been very self-centered (yes, I know he's only 5!). He is quick to throw tantrums and get angry - even more than the almost-3yo. After so much of it, I also lose my patience and am not the parent I intend to be. My hormones are all over the place, and my GI has stopped working since the miscarriage (I'm not kidding when I have say I have not pooped without medical intervention since May 23rd), but those are excuses, and I need to find a way to fill my own tank and not lose it with the kids.
My apologies that this was so long. I guess I needed to vent, too!
Thank you for saying so - it is too much! In the lead-up, I also had an infection, then covid, then food poisoning, and two days after that, the miscarriage bleeding began. It has been relentless since mid-April.
That is a great question, and I don't have the answer. It has been a dark time.
I hope this is the end, too. I need a break. It has been rainy and unseasonably chilly where I am (in the south, for cryin' out loud!) for all the weekdays I've been home with the kids. W. T. F. I can't get even literal sunshine, nevermind any of the figurative kind.
Ohhhhhhhh Kristen! I am so, so sorry you've been going through all of this. Sending big hugs and I really hope things start looking up soon. And please give yourself some grace regarding not being the parent you want to be right now. You need to focus on healing and taking care of yourself. Your kids will be fine even if you fully can't be there for them for a while and if you lose your temper with them, etc. It's absolutely okay to be human. Treat yourself kindly.
I was going to get on here and ask if others had the same problem I'm having this year with the kids (mine are 10 year old twin boys) suddenly not liking camp anymore and not wanting to go. Now I see several are having the same problem. Makes me feel better.
SAME! My 9.5 year old son refused to get out of the car at camp last week. He had been before and enjoyed it last summer, but didn’t know any friends at this particular session. I pulled him out and the director took pity on me and refunded part of the $400 fee. But then my husband and I had our work week disrupted since we can’t leave him home alone. I think a summer caregiver may be a better option next year. The problem is that my younger one loves camps, so I need to figure out how to compromise without going broke double paying for a camp and a sitter.
There is a point where if it’s not high interest, it may no longer fly. One of my children vetoed my towns rec camps, reporting it was too much arts arts and crafts (it was) and that there were herds of children doing whatever (there were). Farm Camps, animals, boating were more his sped (but more expensive🙄)
The hardest transition has been to adjust to having new babysitters around, after a long stretch where it was just school in the mornings and me in the afternoons with my 4yo son (with some pinch hitting from my husband). Both he and my husband are “No no NEVER... OK!” types, so the first few epic sitter transition meltdowns for my son are just now slowly turning into, “Hi! Are you ready to see my trucks?” My husband has followed my son’s trajectory... at first questioning if we needed someone else besides us, to stressing out over the transition tantrums, to going, “OMG! You mean that one of us can gain self-care time without another the other having to give it up? This is great!” I’m trying to be patient with their process, but I’m also unabashedly thrilled to be splitting the maternal mental load with more brains (and energetic bodies), and may never go back.
Ha!!! This sounds JUST like my 12yo. Any change is TERRIBLE until it happens and then he's like "why didn't we do this sooner?" Anyway - YAY for new babysitters and more self-care!!!! And congrats on getting (mostly) through that transition!
Love this. Glad that I’m not alone in loving a human with this temperament! It probably served an evolutionary purpose at one point? As a science writer, you would likely know better than me!
Mine were fine and looking foward to summer and next year. The school keeps schedules pretty normal (just lots of fun during the day) until the last day. We don't do camps. My kids are anti-camp and anti planned activities in general. One had some emotions this morning during our family meeting to set rules and expectations around screen time, cleaning crap out time, and outside time, but that was minor. Mostly I invite their friends over, throw some snacks on the table, and ignore them. It helps that mine are 11 and 14 now but pretty much this is what we have been doing since I can remember. I hope it improves for everyone!
Can we talk about the absolute shitshow that it is to sign up for these things in January? All the figuring it out, piecing together schedules and actually signup? When they are 6-9 it’s not huge. But then OPINION creeps in for tweens. January Tween opinion can be different than July Tween opinion. Cue the “ WHY AM I GOING TO THIS CAMP?”...🙄 One of my children is now 17 and works. The other is 14 is in ESY at a private program supporting his literacy. He is not thrilled about parts of it but at least there is direct reason for going. And I can fully acknowledge how he feels about the less desirable parts.... https://www.tiktok.com/@dyslexianowwhat/video/7236863589221485867?_r=1&_t=8dPCTL4WWBa&social_sharing=v3
My daughter just finished her first year of pre-k and it has been ROUGH!! Suddenly my spirited but averagely behaved preschooler has turned into a monster - lots of hitting everyone (her poor baby sister is a survivor!!), tantrums, rudeness and refusal to listen. I had no idea it was coming so I’m glad to know it’s common. We’ve tried to talk to her about how she’s feeling about the transition but she won’t engage. So we’re just rolling with it until is passes. 😅
Yeah, it's so hard — sometimes they aren't consciously aware of why they're struggling, so even though you may be sure about the cause, when you try to engage they're all "No! It's not that at all!" And then they're even more upset.... sighhhhhh
I think my main complaint about summer is that by the time you find the routine of summer and your kids are in a groove (and mine REALLY need a rock-solid routine), it's over and you're going through the transition of back to school. Also, SO MUCH STUFF TO PACK for summer camp. my kiddo can manage the packing of things needed for school but summer camp just feels so disorganized with the different things needed on different days (this day is swim! then must have camp tshirt for field trip, lunch for this day but then need $5 for special lunch the next). cue swirly eyes here.
On top of last week of school, my kid has a lingering cold that has us wondering if there's something else going on. Two possible nightmare scenarios: celiac disease, which I have and my major noticeable symptom was a lot of lingering colds. Need to get him tested for that again. Or a sudden allergy to our cat. I started giving him Claritin yesterday to see if that did anything and ... maybe? Not that it would have to be a cat allergy if it was an allergy. (Well, the cat, who is only three, may have a return of a precancerous growth so who knows how long we'll have it anyway! Life is grand.) But he could also just finally be getting a little better unrelated to the Claritin. And the thing is, my kid has an active gag reflex and coughing fits sometimes turn into vomiting. So that's been fun. Huge dark circles under his eyes.
That plus last week of school stress has him having rage explosions at his friends the likes of which we haven't really seen in a couple years, since the early pandemic pod year where he was with these kids all the time and they had all just kind of had enough. Just a kind of tormented anger from him that I've only seen a couple times since then, and now it's happened like three times in three days. If you get angry at him, he gets angrier and angrier. If you express sympathy and understanding that he's unhappy, he dissolves into tears of utter misery. Now we have coming up a rainy weekend where these kids are the available playmates but we don't know that that's a good idea.
Big tears on my kids last day of school! Thankfully we have a couple weeks to lay low before summer camp starts (which my 10 yo daughter is dreading).
Both of my kids are runners when they get upset! How do you deal with it? If I don’t chase after them I get accused of not caring, but if I do will they just keep running?
When my 8yo runs off she doesn't really want me to chase her.... she wants to be alone. Does your kiddo get mad if you don't chase?
Yes, I get accused of not caring about their feelings. They will come back and say something like “I was hurt/sad/fill in the blank and no one even checked on me!” It was probably 5 minutes max when they come back over and say this. This is generally from the younger one. I think my older one does want to be left alone but I get nervous about her running outside and potentially off to somewhere I may not be able to find her.
Here to VENT!!!
In Houston, we are in our 4th week of summer. First a trip, then a half-day camp at our school, then 2 weeks where my son didn't know anyone at his day camps. He is now 11 and handled that way better than he would have in the past, but around midweek, he runs out of steam. Last week, he woke up with a stomach ache, we let him miss a day + go for partial days after that (with temperatures over 100 outside for soccer and that seemed rational, though they had some inside space too).
This week he says all the kids scream at his camp, lots of screaming. He goes to a very quiet Montessori school so I'm sure this is jarring to him! But also good for him to see other schools and cultures. ANYWAY, now he is begging not to go. We've compromised on a shorter day. But I'm still like DAMN. Why do I spend all this effort setting up camps to have so much frustration when they finally roll around?
Also this week is archery + horseback riding, but he says they do more music and art than either of the named activities (1st day a horse came to them and they each sat on it for a few minutes, 3 days include a bus ride out of town to a ranch with horses).
Another misrepresentation I see a lot with camps is the stated times (in January February) of like 8am-4pm. Then when it really rolls around they shorten the day to be: drop off between 8 and 9 pick up 3-4. So you know they are just sitting around in those transition hours...It's a scam.
Additionally, Payflex, to pay for these camps with pretax money, and it's annoying to basically have the money withheld from my paycheck, while I have to pay for the camps out of pocket...then other years, to get the reimbursement, they've been sticklers about the receipts saying my son's age, but at least that was a bit smoother this year, though the money hasn't shown up yet.
And running off – my son did that around the age of 8 a few times, in an airport too! And some times after that and even within this year, but way less. Anyway, it one of the major reasons we started therapy as a family + it has helped with many things. We do equine therapy and it's fun + hopefully logging in some good relationship skills before puberty really hits hard. https://naturallifemanship.com/
Don't want to make it seem that Texas is all horses...like it may sound in this post, we really do have to travel out of the city (though all the sprawl!) to get to them...
Wow Sheila this is a lot! I'm sorry you're dealing with so many camp woes with your kiddo.
Thank you. Just really hit hard yesterday and was timed with your question.
https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/a-parents-dream-summer-camp
Someone knows the pain! and update: the Payflex money arrived. Next week is sleep-away camp = basically a vacation and 6-day date.
I find that the hardest part of the summer is the sibling fighting! My kids are 7,5, and 3 and the fighting feels like it’s nearly constant! Just wanted to post this so that any other parents experiencing this feel less alone :)
So much fighting. Still at 11,9,7...but maybe a little bit less than at 7,5,3 and omg I am once again realizing I can’t believe my husband somehow wfh during 2020 with kids at age 8,6,4y
The fighting is so hard! It's finally dying down now here that my kids are older ... they just don't engage with each other as much, which makes it easier. Hang in there!!!
Thank you for your virtual support! I will keep hanging in there!
In case these are helpful: https://melindawmoyer.substack.com/p/how-to-put-an-end-to-sibling-bickering and https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/15/parenting/big-kid/what-to-do-when-your-kids-fight.html
Thank you for sharing that!!!
I feel like my kids are fighting more as they get older. They are 10 and 8, my oldest has ADHD and she wants to boss her brother because she gets more corrections and it just leads to disaster. Summer is so hard!
OMG love this prompt because this transition is SO hard in my household and I need to vent. For my younger kid (6 yo, just finished kindergarten) this is her first summer "off"/not in preschool (pandemic summer 2020 not withstanding) so there has just been lots of "when am I in first grade?", "what day is swim lessons?", "do I go to camp tomorrow?", "when do we go on vacation???" Endless questions. I make monthly calendars for the kids to help visualize time and what is coming next, which works great when we are on a routine schedule, but not right now.
My older daughter (age 9, just finished 3rd grade) sounds a lot like your 8 yo Melinda! So much slamming, huffing, eye rolling, "I SAID I DON'T WANT TO GO TO CAMP!!!", etc. I'm definitely feeling frazzled after the general schedule craziness of the last month of school - the field trips, field day, performances, kinder promotion, etc etc. and then being in summer break in a family with both parents who work full time, M-F with limited flexibility.
My kids ended school last Wednesday and this week is the only week of camps we are doing. My older kid has not enjoyed them and I relate to what another commenter said about spending all the energy and money trying to organize camps and ultimately kid doesn't enjoy them and they present their own logistical challenges (like being flung into every corner of the metro area so we spend a ton of time in the car). I'm trying an experiment this summer of hiring a summer caregiver to be with the kids about 80% of the work week who will (hopefully) facilitate a more relaxed summer of outings, playdates with friends, craft and cooking projects at home. I worked as a summer nanny in college and it was a great gig for me, so I'm cautiously optimistic. My fear is that we will end up in a sibling rivalry spiral due to all the togetherness. FINGERS CROSSED.
Oh, great idea to hire a summer caregiver! I am crossing my fingers with you! Also, super smart to make monthly calendars. My 8yo loves the visual reminders, too. GOOD LUCK!
I'm so glad I'm not alone. The last day of school here was May 24th, but that happened to be the day of my cousin's high school graduation in my hometown, which is 4 hours away. Instead of sitting in the car for 8 hours in a day (I went alone and needed to be back to care for the kids the next day since no school), I used miles to fly down and back. Except, upon my return, my aunt took me to the airport an hour after I requested, and I missed my flight. The last one home that night. After three rental car desks, I finally found an available car to drive home. Before hitting the road at 11 PM, I went to the bathroom, and the baby that had miscarried - did I mention I was experiencing a miscarriage at this time? - came out and landed on the toilet seat. I can't make this up.
That was how summer started for us, and it's been pretty brutal since then. Last week was a reprieve when we were at the beach with family and had entertainment and extra hands (my stepmom cooked dinner, and omg what a difference that makes in an evening with littles!). Our biggest issue is the almost-6yo is whiny and needs constant entertainment. He's a really empathetic kid but seems to be in a lull for perspective-taking and has been very self-centered (yes, I know he's only 5!). He is quick to throw tantrums and get angry - even more than the almost-3yo. After so much of it, I also lose my patience and am not the parent I intend to be. My hormones are all over the place, and my GI has stopped working since the miscarriage (I'm not kidding when I have say I have not pooped without medical intervention since May 23rd), but those are excuses, and I need to find a way to fill my own tank and not lose it with the kids.
My apologies that this was so long. I guess I needed to vent, too!
Kristen, that is too much. I’m hoping for better for you for the rest of the summer.
Thank you for saying so - it is too much! In the lead-up, I also had an infection, then covid, then food poisoning, and two days after that, the miscarriage bleeding began. It has been relentless since mid-April.
Oh my goodness how are you even still functioning!!!! You poor thing!!! I hope this is the end of it!!!
That is a great question, and I don't have the answer. It has been a dark time.
I hope this is the end, too. I need a break. It has been rainy and unseasonably chilly where I am (in the south, for cryin' out loud!) for all the weekdays I've been home with the kids. W. T. F. I can't get even literal sunshine, nevermind any of the figurative kind.
I’m so sorry.
Oh Kristen, internet stranger here sending you love
💜💜💜
Ohhhhhhhh Kristen! I am so, so sorry you've been going through all of this. Sending big hugs and I really hope things start looking up soon. And please give yourself some grace regarding not being the parent you want to be right now. You need to focus on healing and taking care of yourself. Your kids will be fine even if you fully can't be there for them for a while and if you lose your temper with them, etc. It's absolutely okay to be human. Treat yourself kindly.
Way easier said than done, but you are right. Thanks for the encouragement <3
I was going to get on here and ask if others had the same problem I'm having this year with the kids (mine are 10 year old twin boys) suddenly not liking camp anymore and not wanting to go. Now I see several are having the same problem. Makes me feel better.
SAME! My 9.5 year old son refused to get out of the car at camp last week. He had been before and enjoyed it last summer, but didn’t know any friends at this particular session. I pulled him out and the director took pity on me and refunded part of the $400 fee. But then my husband and I had our work week disrupted since we can’t leave him home alone. I think a summer caregiver may be a better option next year. The problem is that my younger one loves camps, so I need to figure out how to compromise without going broke double paying for a camp and a sitter.
There is a point where if it’s not high interest, it may no longer fly. One of my children vetoed my towns rec camps, reporting it was too much arts arts and crafts (it was) and that there were herds of children doing whatever (there were). Farm Camps, animals, boating were more his sped (but more expensive🙄)
The hardest transition has been to adjust to having new babysitters around, after a long stretch where it was just school in the mornings and me in the afternoons with my 4yo son (with some pinch hitting from my husband). Both he and my husband are “No no NEVER... OK!” types, so the first few epic sitter transition meltdowns for my son are just now slowly turning into, “Hi! Are you ready to see my trucks?” My husband has followed my son’s trajectory... at first questioning if we needed someone else besides us, to stressing out over the transition tantrums, to going, “OMG! You mean that one of us can gain self-care time without another the other having to give it up? This is great!” I’m trying to be patient with their process, but I’m also unabashedly thrilled to be splitting the maternal mental load with more brains (and energetic bodies), and may never go back.
Ha!!! This sounds JUST like my 12yo. Any change is TERRIBLE until it happens and then he's like "why didn't we do this sooner?" Anyway - YAY for new babysitters and more self-care!!!! And congrats on getting (mostly) through that transition!
Love this. Glad that I’m not alone in loving a human with this temperament! It probably served an evolutionary purpose at one point? As a science writer, you would likely know better than me!
Mine were fine and looking foward to summer and next year. The school keeps schedules pretty normal (just lots of fun during the day) until the last day. We don't do camps. My kids are anti-camp and anti planned activities in general. One had some emotions this morning during our family meeting to set rules and expectations around screen time, cleaning crap out time, and outside time, but that was minor. Mostly I invite their friends over, throw some snacks on the table, and ignore them. It helps that mine are 11 and 14 now but pretty much this is what we have been doing since I can remember. I hope it improves for everyone!
This cracks me up! I needed a laugh. And a reminder that it doesn't have to be so serious.
Amazing!! Thanks for sharing!
Can we talk about the absolute shitshow that it is to sign up for these things in January? All the figuring it out, piecing together schedules and actually signup? When they are 6-9 it’s not huge. But then OPINION creeps in for tweens. January Tween opinion can be different than July Tween opinion. Cue the “ WHY AM I GOING TO THIS CAMP?”...🙄 One of my children is now 17 and works. The other is 14 is in ESY at a private program supporting his literacy. He is not thrilled about parts of it but at least there is direct reason for going. And I can fully acknowledge how he feels about the less desirable parts.... https://www.tiktok.com/@dyslexianowwhat/video/7236863589221485867?_r=1&_t=8dPCTL4WWBa&social_sharing=v3
My daughter just finished her first year of pre-k and it has been ROUGH!! Suddenly my spirited but averagely behaved preschooler has turned into a monster - lots of hitting everyone (her poor baby sister is a survivor!!), tantrums, rudeness and refusal to listen. I had no idea it was coming so I’m glad to know it’s common. We’ve tried to talk to her about how she’s feeling about the transition but she won’t engage. So we’re just rolling with it until is passes. 😅
Yeah, it's so hard — sometimes they aren't consciously aware of why they're struggling, so even though you may be sure about the cause, when you try to engage they're all "No! It's not that at all!" And then they're even more upset.... sighhhhhh
I think my main complaint about summer is that by the time you find the routine of summer and your kids are in a groove (and mine REALLY need a rock-solid routine), it's over and you're going through the transition of back to school. Also, SO MUCH STUFF TO PACK for summer camp. my kiddo can manage the packing of things needed for school but summer camp just feels so disorganized with the different things needed on different days (this day is swim! then must have camp tshirt for field trip, lunch for this day but then need $5 for special lunch the next). cue swirly eyes here.
YES TO ALL OF THIS.
On top of last week of school, my kid has a lingering cold that has us wondering if there's something else going on. Two possible nightmare scenarios: celiac disease, which I have and my major noticeable symptom was a lot of lingering colds. Need to get him tested for that again. Or a sudden allergy to our cat. I started giving him Claritin yesterday to see if that did anything and ... maybe? Not that it would have to be a cat allergy if it was an allergy. (Well, the cat, who is only three, may have a return of a precancerous growth so who knows how long we'll have it anyway! Life is grand.) But he could also just finally be getting a little better unrelated to the Claritin. And the thing is, my kid has an active gag reflex and coughing fits sometimes turn into vomiting. So that's been fun. Huge dark circles under his eyes.
That plus last week of school stress has him having rage explosions at his friends the likes of which we haven't really seen in a couple years, since the early pandemic pod year where he was with these kids all the time and they had all just kind of had enough. Just a kind of tormented anger from him that I've only seen a couple times since then, and now it's happened like three times in three days. If you get angry at him, he gets angrier and angrier. If you express sympathy and understanding that he's unhappy, he dissolves into tears of utter misery. Now we have coming up a rainy weekend where these kids are the available playmates but we don't know that that's a good idea.