Why Moms Are Consistently Undervalued
Three new insights from the research.
TGIF, everyone! I know; my newsletter is a little late today. I taught yesterday at NYU and then, for the first time in probably a decade, went to the Metropolitan opera with my husband (Tosca!), which meant that I did not have my usual evening writing time. So here we are.
Also, fun news! Because today is the start of my kids’ spring break, and I am feeling festive an excited for spring, I am running a flash spring sale on paid subscriptions through this Sunday. Get access to all my essays, advice, and threads and join our wonderful parent community for just $37.50 a year or $3.75/month.
Now let’s move on to today’s topic. I often ponder why mothers are still, in the 21st century, burdened with far more caregiving and housekeeping work than fathers are. I know there are exceptions to this rule — that some dads take on an equal or above-equal share, and that things can look quite different in same-gender partnerships. But the numbers suggest that in cis-gender heterosexual partnerships, women still do the lion’s share of domestic labor.
One reason women are overburdened is that their labor is “invisible” — it goes unnoticed by partners and society at large. If other people don’t see all that women do, how can we ever expect things to change?
Over the past month, I’ve been fortunate enough to travel to see scientists present new studies that get at this central question. I consider research like this incredibly important, because in order to shift the status quo, we first have to understand the many reasons why it exists. Here are three new insights from researchers at NYU, Stanford and the University of Georgia that shed light on why women’s work is perpetually under-recognized.