It's My Book Launch Day. I'll Be at the Orthodontist.

The joys of authoring as a mom

It’s here, it’s finally here!!!!!! My second book, Hello, Cruel World!: Science-Based Strategies for Raising Terrific Kids in Terrifying Times, is out in the world today!!!!

Book launch days are so emotionally intense; I’d rank them as Top Ten Life Days, after kid births, wedding days, and maybe high school and college graduations. You have all the feels, including pride and abject terror.

But while book launch days feel monumental, they can also be …. eerily quiet and mundane. You’ve waited for so long, and the book is on bookshelves and people are (maybe? hopefully? please dear god) buying it, but very few people have actually read it yet, so you’re once again…… waiting. Twiddling your thumbs. You’re wondering if people are inhaling it, thumbing through it while frowning, or putting it on their nightstand where it will sit, unperturbed, for six months and then be relegated to a bookshelf. You’re also wondering if (sob!) maybe people aren’t buying it at all.

Nobody puts Baby on a bookshelf.

Because the universe has a twisted sense of humor, my book launch day also falls on a school holiday. And not just any holiday — a five-day Memorial Day weekend. So today, as I spiral into launch-day anxiety, I’ll be spending quality time with the very best companions for a fragile mental state: small, loud, bored humans with zero impulse control.

First, I’ll be picking my son up from a sleepover (yay, a sleep-deprived 14-year-old), then dropping my 10-year-old daughter at a playdate, and then I’ll be spending my lunch hour at the orthodontist, where my son will get a retainer refitting (why?). Then my daughter has an appointment, and then I’ll drive my son to and from soccer practice, and then I’ll realize that I have nothing planned for dinner. Maybe somewhere in there I’ll post some Instagram photos and have a mini-freak out. I don’t know. I’ll definitely stress eat some candy. (Related, my kids and I discovered a candy shop in Hudson, New York this weekend that makes literally the best candy any of us have ever eaten. And, if you’re wondering, no, phew, my renters did not trash my house.)

But being surrounded by kids when your book launches isn’t all bad. My daughter keeps saying, “Mom, are you excited your book is coming out?” which is the cutest thing ever, but also, yes, slightly anxiety-provoking. Yesterday evening, I had burgers at a friends’ house, and their third grader created an AI song to celebrate my book release. It’s titled “A New Adventure Awaits” (you can listen to the entire song here), and these are my favorite lyrics:

Characters lively, stories unfold,

Dreams and magic, a sight to behold.

Each chapter buzzes, excitement in air,

A world to explore, oh we’re going there!

Feel the rhythm, feel the beat.

Every word sings, feel that heat!

And that’s not all: My daughter and her friend choreographed an entire dance on a trampoline to this song, but out of respect for their privacy (I mean I don’t know, but I’m not sure they’d be thrilled to have this video online in three years) I’m not going to share it here. Trust me when I say it’s amazing, though. Kids really know how to celebrate things.

Isn’t this the ultimate metaphor for parenthood? You could be winning a Pulitzer or walking the red carpet, and you’d still be expected to watch a freshly choreographed dance, hand out 321 snacks and clean vomit out of car seats between photo ops. No matter how big the day, your kid’s creations, hunger, and bodily functions will always matter more. Also, apparently, their orthodontics.

This feeling — that parenting trumps everything else — is largely why I wrote my book. Some of this reality is timeless; parenting has often involved putting one’s kids first. But in today’s intensive parenting culture, we’re told to put our kids first in so many ways, and some of these cultural expectations are unnecessary and even, frankly, harmful. Both for us and our kids. I wrote Hello, Cruel World! to cut through the intensive parenting noise and help parents understand what the research really says about how to raise kids who can survive and thrive in this rapidly changing world. Because often, it doesn’t align with what we’re being told.

I mentioned this in yesterday’s post, but my book got a couple of early and fantastic reviews. New Scientist magazine — the very magazine that caused me to decide to become a science journalist, in fact — said that “weary parents shouldn't miss this science-backed guide to raising kids,” while The iPaper wrote: “There are some books that I return to time and time again to help me with parenting — and life itself. Science journalist Melinda Wenner Moyer’s new book … is destined to become one of those well-thumbed manuals.”

I couldn’t be more thrilled.

I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: I couldn’t have done this without YOU. So many of the themes, ideas and stories in my book come from you, dear readers, and the conversations we’ve had right here over the years. You’ve been a true inspiration. I’ve been so grateful for your wisdom and your curiosity, and I hope that you find that my book gives you answers to the many questions you’ve raised here in my discussion threads and chats. But more than anything else, I hope that my book helps you feel less scared, and more hopeful, about the future.

I can’t wait to hear what you think.